Loving Yourself Shouldn't Be Hard, Right?
I know it can be really hard to love yourself. You make mistakes and you find flaws in yourself more often than not. Obsessing over imperfections and rerunning past scenarios in your head. Thinking of how things could have gone if you said something different or acted a certain way. You turn into the reflection of someone else to fit in and lose sight of who you are. It's time to love yourself and here is how.
1: Stop running from your feelings
It’s important to acknowledge all of your feelings. Even the painful ones. They are a crucial part of who you are. Don’t run from the uncomfortable ones like anger or sadness. Accept them and take a moment to really feel them. Stop downplaying them. Your feelings are always valid and if you don’t validate them then you are not validating yourself.
2: Stop comparing yourself to others
No one is better or worse than you. We are all just different. Perfection is just a construct and impossible to achieve. Your idea of perfection is different from mine and every single person out there. You have value and it's time to stop comparing yourself to others and start accepting yourself.
3: Be present
Life is full of distractions. You could be out with friends and get an email from work and feel the need to read it. It’s best to put it aside and be truly in the moment. Practicing active meditation and mindfulness daily will allow you to be more present with yourself and everyone around you.
4: Forgive yourself
Sometimes we hold onto regrets and find that we are telling ourselves that we could have done better. Self-forgiveness is about believing that you truly did the best that you could. You shouldn’t judge your past self as you did not have the knowledge you do now. One thing to remember is that when we know better we do better.
5: Speak kindly to yourself
You are your own worst enemy. Stop criticizing yourself and start talking to yourself as if you were talking to a loved one. Start telling yourself that you are enough, that you matter, and that you are beautiful even if you don’t believe it. Trust me, eventually you will.
6: Treat yourself
Just because you didn’t do something that deserves a reward doesn’t mean you shouldn’t treat yourself. You are allowed to treat yourself to something just because. Gesture, an on-demand gift delivery app based in New York City, is something I highly recommend using for this. You can order yourself some desserts or a bottle of wine and have it delivered right to your door the same day.
By practicing self-love you will find yourself starting to really blossom and grow into something extraordinary. One day you won’t need to practice self-love anymore as it will come naturally to you. I believe in you and I hope you believe in yourself too.